feel-good faith

This week is the third week of Lent, a season of fasting and contemplation. I've looked forward to these forty days leading up to the celebration of Easter. I had determined that it would be a time of prayer and spiritual growth. I had expected days of reflection and experiencing that floaty, abstract feeling of being close to God. God, on the other hand, seems to have other plans for my spiritual growth. Instead of the feel-good emotions that so many of us attribute to spirituality, it's been one hard situation after another. I've been left feeling drained and disappointed.

But I'm learning more about God this way.

It hit me this afternoon, as I was agonizing over yet another stressful situation, that this was my chance to become more Christ-like. I won't grow in my faith by experiencing nothing but feel-good spiritual highs. It's in facing the tough days that I realize that I can't do it on my own strength (something that I really need to be reminded of every day). I'm forced to rely either on my own, flawed strength to get me through or to cling to Christ. Each difficult moment is a chance to follow Christ in how I react to the situation. Do I show grace to others or do I sulk and feel sorry for myself? Do I serve others regardless of how I'm feeling? After all, it's easy to serve others when we're in a good mood or when everyone is getting along. But Christ doesn't excuse us from serving others just because we're having a bad day or because others aren't "playing nice".

Jesus stated "If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil." (Luke 6:32-35, ESV)

Expecting nothing in return.

Too often I serve others expecting some reward or praise. But Christ calls us to serve when there are no returns, when there's no point to the good things we're doing. It's not a matter of being blessed for our good deeds, but of being obedient to our call as Christ's followers.