insights

My husband and I had an amazing time in Kyoto, Japan this past week. The trip really opened our eyes to the possibilities of mission work. Stefan has always been interested in missions since I've known him. I've always told myself and others that I supported his decision for our family to possibly engage in full time missions work, but I've always held back a part of my heart, secretly hoping that it just wouldn't happen. After all, I would have to leave my comfort zone of the area I grew up in and my family behind...a very daunting idea. But I really loved Kyoto. And not only that, but God revealed His heart to me about the Japanese people. The shrines and temples that dotted the city were so beautiful and serene, but it was also saddening to watch the people with their rituals. They work hard to please the fates/gods by trying to follow the right steps and the right motions. It reminded me of just how much freedom I have in Christ.

on reading "The Gospel According to Starbucks"

So I picked up The Gospel According to Starbucks today. It had been sitting in a stack of to-read books that my husband and I keep piled high in the bedroom. One of my husband's friends let him borrow it, but I'm getting around to reading it first.

So far, I've only read the first chapter. And I'm trying to keep an open, unbiased mind. Which is hard, since I'm not particularly a fan of Starbucks. In fact, I've only actually been in a Starbucks once, and that only because I had a gift certificate. I prefer to sit at my table at home and sip on fresh brewed coffee with plenty of sugar and milk; if I do go out for coffee, I actually like the coffee served at Booksamillion. Hopefully I won't get stoned for saying that.

I noticed that Sweet quoted Jesus as saying "The children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light." Not remembering having read that before, I checked his end note and found he was citing Luke 16:8 from the KJV. I'm trying to develop the habit that no matter what I read, that I always "double check" the author when they say they are quoting Scripture...by going to the *gasp!* the Bible itself. Since I don't actually own a KJV Bible, I looked up the verse on Blueletterbible.org, and indeed, Luke 16:8 does say "The children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light"....in the second half of the verse. Sweet ignores the very crucial "for" placed right before that sentence. The "for" is actually the transition word from the parable that Jesus was teaching...which happens to be titled "The Unrighteous Steward".

And he said also unto his disciples, There was a certain rich man, which had a steward; and the same was accused unto him that he had wasted his goods. And he called him, and said unto him, How is it that I hear this of thee? give an account of thy stewardship; for thou mayest be no longer steward. Then the steward said within himself, What shall I do? for my lord taketh away from me the stewardship: I cannot dig; to beg I am ashamed. I am resolved what to do, that, when I am put out of the stewardship, they may receive me into their houses. So he called every one of his lord's debtors [unto him], and said unto the first, How much owest thou unto my lord? And he said, An hundred measures of oil. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and sit down quickly, and write fifty. Then said he to another, And how much owest thou? And he said, An hundred measures of wheat. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and write fourscore. And the lord commended the unjust steward, because he had done wisely: for the children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light. Luke 16:1-9

Considering that Sweet was using the phrase to justify that the church needs to learn from the world (since the world is wiser than the church according to this verse), I'm not sure if this is the best verse to pick, at least not if you are going to read the rest of the Scriptures surrounding the text and not just pick the text up out of its context and make an application. After all, "we do not create meaning out of text; rather, we seek to find the meaning that is already there" (Duvall and Hays, Grasping God's Word).

Sweet also seems to be taking the position of "doctrine is bad for us" which is becoming more and more common, particularly in the emergent church. He states that "Intellectual arguments over doctrine and theology are fine for divinity school, but they lose impact at the level of daily life experience." However, Wendy Horger Alsup's book Practical Theology for Women is all about how doctrine and theology ought to affect our daily lives. She writes "So we study theology that we may know God and be enlightened to the benefits of our relationship with him." Furthermore, this concept of "doctrine is evil/bad" is almost becoming a doctrine itself. A doctrine is "a particular principle, position, or policy taught or advocated, as of a religion or government" and "something that is taught; teachings collectively" (dictionary.com). And many people, particularly those involved with the emergent church, are regularly teaching/asserting that doctrine has become almost the bane of our faith. However, by teaching this idea and being in agreement, it sort of becomes a doctrine in and of itself, and even more so, a doctrine that is common to the emergent church. But I may be only be making a generalization; after all, I have read very few emergent books/literature, though I do plan on reading more.

Still, this is, after all, only chapter one, and maybe it's a little too early to jump on the guy regarding his hermeneutics (a fancy word for the study/interpretation/application of the Bible). And it's also a bit of a jump to affirmatively assert what he is trying assert (in regards to any particular doctrine); I have no idea what direction he is going to take in the rest of the book. However, The Gospel According to Starbucks has gotten me started thinking...and that's always a good thing.

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The cares of this world have really been dragging me down the past few weeks. Between the car accident, the trip, stresses at work, the never ending clutter at home, I almost feel like I can't breathe. On top of all of it, church feels like just another chore, another thing on my impossibly long to-do list to mark off. I managed to drag myself there last Sunday morning, but I left feeling so tired that my husband actually commented on how ragged I looked. Not that I didn't enjoy the sermon or the worship, it just left me feeling drained.

I feel out of balance. I've been missing my devotions, eating too much, exercising too little, and over all doing nothing productive. And I carry so much of my self-worth in my productivity. I feel like I have to be doing something all of the time or that I'm a waste.

I know this isn't biblical. But if I have a hard time believing my husband when he tells me how beautiful/wonderful I am, how can I possibly believe the infinite Creator of the universe? I carry this little seed of doubt in me. I can apply the verse "you were fearfully and wonderfully made" to other people, but not to myself. It's like in my mind I'm the one exception to that rule, so I have to make up for it somehow.

Ultimately, that's just plain egotistical of me, to think I'm somehow "other" that I fall outside of God's grace. I say I rely on His grace, but then I scramble to prove myself: to God, my husband, my parents, my co-workers, my friends. When all the time God tells me I have nothing to prove.

Now I just have to work on truly believing that.

I wanted to post the link to the joint travel blog I'm sharing with my husband: The Genki Gaijin Chronicles. Genki gaijin roughly translates to "over-enthusiastic/extremely happy foreigner" in Japanese. The travel blog will cover our trip to Kyoto, Japan. The description of our hotel states that there is high-speed internet access in public areas. Hopefully we'll be able to update once a day, most likely at night, which will be mid-morning here.

Anyway, prayers for safe travel are much appreciated.