Book Review: Revitalize Your Spiritual Life

I just finished up Revitalize Your Spiritual Life: A Woman's Guide for Vibrant Christian Living. It's a compilation of excerpts from some of the women writers over at Thomas Nelson publishers, featuring snippets from books by Shelia Walsh, Stormie Omartian, and others. It could easily be described as a sampler of the publisher's women's interest books. The book is set up topically, covering two broad motifs: "The Things That Keep Us Stuck" and "The Things That Set Us Free".

These aren't authors I normally read. In fact, I have never read anything else by any of the authors featured. Stormie Omartian was the only writer I recognized, and the featured book Confessions of a Good Christian Girl was the only book I had considered purchasing out of all of the books featured. Normally I am very cynical about Christian living books geared toward women. They all seem to say the same thing and just add to already existing feelings of inadequacy. The genre seems to promote the image of that perfect modern Christian woman (the Proverbs 31 wife in khakis and pastel-colored blouses).

So I set my cynicism aside and starting reading. I didn't really like the sampler style as it felt it jumped around a bit, and I had to adjust to each writer's style from page to page. I was able to pick out author's I would be interested in picking up some more of their books - and others I would probably avoid.

As for the content, I have to admit I was surprised. Yes, there were bits of the same-old, same-old content. But I honestly found the book re-freshing. Even if the content wasn't completely new, I was challenged and encouraged by the writers. It began as a book I wasn't sure I was going to enjoy and it ended with over a dozen sticky tabs sticking out of the side, marking portions that really spoke to me.

So here is my final opinion: if you want deep, theological teaching you might want to skip it (not that the writer's aren't theologically sound - but if you're wanting straight theology, doctrine or apologetics, this isn't it). But if you want a little boost, a book that's easy to read and that will encourage you, it's a good read.

Book Review: The Christian Atheist

I just finished reading The Christian Atheist: Believing in God but Living as if He Doesn't Exist by Craig Groeschel, so I thought I would write up a little review to have something to post. The title is pretty self-explanatory. Groeschel is addressing what seems to be a growing problem in today's church: those who call themselves Christians but go on living their lives any sort of way. Each chapter is geared toward a specific way we may profess Christ, but live contrary to those beliefs. They range from the basics (chapter one being "When You Believe in God But Don't Really Know Him") to very specific topics (such as chapter eleven: "When You Believe in God But Don't Share Your Faith").

When I first stared reading The Christian Atheist, I thought I was going to have to force myself through the book. I don't know much about Groeschel himself, and I'm usually a little uneasy of a book when I'm not sure of the author's theology prior to reading it. The first few chapters covered general topics like not really knowing God or being ashamed of your past. The book really started catching my attention in Chapter 4 with "When You Believe in God but Not in Prayer". That's when it started truly getting challenging, and it seemed to just keep building from there. By the time I got to the last two chapters, the book was hard to read, not because it was boring and generic, but because it was so convicting. I found myself racing through the chapter about sharing your faith because evangelism is extremely hard for me (being an incredibly shy person). I had to force myself to slow down and really focus, because so much of what he was saying made me uncomfortable - because it made me realize I wasn't really living like a Christian after all!

Over all, I would definitely recommend The Christian Atheist. It's easy to read, with plenty of humorous anecdotes to keep your attention. But the focus of the book is the call to truly live your life out for Christ. Groeschel brings the reader's attention to the supremacy of Christ and how we are called to live differently from the rest of the world.

the hazards of journals

I've been reading through my older journals, marveling at how so many petty things seemed so monumentally important at the time. Tiffs between friends, minor grievances that were so important at the time, pages of teenage angst. It's laughable and highly embarrassing.

I did notice a pattern though: I seem to describe the same spiritual struggles, over and over and over again. Feeling spiritually "dry", struggling to attend church, neglecting quiet time and Bible study, out right ignoring prayer. The same themes run through each journal.

And I've been a Christian for over ten years.

Frankly, it's scary that I've seemingly not grown for the past decade. I've seen no victory, no triumph. I've studied theology, read through the Bible five times, read numerous Christian living books, but have I gotten anything out of it? Or has it all been outward motions, white-washed tombs?

All I can say is, Jesus, forgive me.

I've been telling myself for the past few months that I'm just in one of those "desert places" - which is a nice euphemism for saying "I just really don't care any more." Studying my journals makes me think it's not so much a temporary thing as an underlying condition. For a majority of the past few years my heart has been cold and unmoved, and I have done very little to change that. I haven't done anything to fight this apathy. Nor have I called out for God to save me from myself.

Because who knows what God might do if I honestly ask Him to wake me up? He might ask me to do something crazy. Something outside my comfort zone. And I'm going to be completely honest: I don't know if I love Jesus enough to step outside my comfort zone.

I want to love Him that much. I want to love Him enough to drop the act, get rid of all the pettiness, to step out and live my life one hundred percent for Him. But fear chokes me, holds me back, and has kept me in the same spot spiritually for years.

And I just let it happen. I let my circumstances dictate how I was going to live. I let the worry of bills stop me from even dreaming of a more meaningful life. I sat back and judged others while my own heart was a withered pit inside my chest. And I've been jealous of others who God has blessed with a ministry; I've mocked and belittled their work, refusing to see God's hand it in.

I'm rather overwhelmed by my own stupidity. I would beat my chest and rend my clothing, but I'm wearing one of my husband's shirts and I don't think he would appreciate it. Joking aside, God has been gracious enough to show me how big of a fool I am.

I know I can't get up from this computer and do anything to change this. That's a God thing. It's a grace thing. It's time for the hard part: to step back and let God do what He wills.

Jesus, seekers, relevance and love

"We frequently hear evangelical Christians say that their non-Christian friends are "seeking God" or "searching for God." Why do we say this when Scripture so clearly teaches that no unregenerate person seeks after God? Thomas Aquinas observed that people are seeking happiness, peace, relief from guilt, personal fulfillment, and other such benefits. We understand that these benefits can be found ultimately in God alone. We draw the inference that, because these people are seeking what God alone can supply, they must be seeking God himself. This is our error. In our fallen condition we desire the benefits that only God can give us but we do not want him. We want the gifts without the Giver, the benefits without the Benefactor." R.C. Sproul, What is Reformed Theology?: Understanding the Basics

When I read this the other day, it brought me to a halt. It made think of all of the sermons and books I've heard and read about being a "seeker sensitive church". Of all the ways we scramble to try not to be offensive to outsiders because we don't want to scare them off.

How can we not be offensive?

What Christians believe is offensive at the core: that there is one God and only one way to that God. In our post-modern world of relativism, that's about as offensive as you can get.

So we take crosses out of the church and sing medleys of secular music to tie into our sermon series. And we assume that the seekers will flock to our church, here the gospel somewhere in our cutesy little sermon about how Jesus wants us to be happy, and then grow to be strong, discipled Christians.

But there are no seekers.

Earlier in the book, Sproul had quoted Romans 3:19-18, part of which states "There is none righteous, no, not one; There is none who understands; There is none who seeks after God. They have all gone out of the way; They have together become unprofitable; There is none who does good, no not one". Sprouls uses this verse to build on the concept of total depravity (or radical corruption as he calls it). To summarize the chapter, he is arguing that unless God calls us, we will not, cannot, seek Him by ourselves.

And if you just thought "Oh, God, she's a Calvinist" I would have to say "Yuppers."

But let's put the "C" word aside for now and focus on the gospel.

Jesus states in Luke 21:17 "All men will hate you because of me." That's about a straightforward as it gets. The world has never, and will never, love Christians. We are scorned because of Christ. And really, there's only one way that we won't be hated: we have to get rid of Christ.

And sadly, that's what some people have done.

To be more "relevant", they've torn apart his message, gotten rid of all the "naughty bits" about him being the only way. Gotten rid of all the tough love sermons about obedience. None of that "taking up your cross" crap. Just us and buddy Christ loving the world straight to hell.

I was chastised by a fellow Christian the other day when I expressed shock and disbelief at another Christian's blatant sin. He told me that she was just another hurting person that needed to be loved on. I couldn't help but think "can we really love someone out of hell?"

The Great Commission states: "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Matthew 28:27-28) Maybe it's just me, but that sounds like a lot more than just loving on people.

Please don't get me wrong. Loving others important. In fact, it's commanded. And even Christ said that to love God and to love others is the sum of the Law. But my understanding of God doesn't stop there.

I've had a friend that for the past two years has been in a "gray area" of faith: stuck between living a Christian life and living her life any old way. Her theology revolves around what God can do for her. For two years I have loved on her, supported her, encouraged her. I have only gingerly corrected her theology once or twice. Out of concern for her feelings and not wanting to seem holier-than-thou, I have never once challenged her health/wealth/prosperity understanding of God. Loving her has not gotten her into church. Loving her has not gotten her to read her Bible. And to be honest, if I really loved her, and God, I would have the nerve to say "There's more to Jesus than what you see right now. Here, let me show you."

feel-good faith

This week is the third week of Lent, a season of fasting and contemplation. I've looked forward to these forty days leading up to the celebration of Easter. I had determined that it would be a time of prayer and spiritual growth. I had expected days of reflection and experiencing that floaty, abstract feeling of being close to God. God, on the other hand, seems to have other plans for my spiritual growth. Instead of the feel-good emotions that so many of us attribute to spirituality, it's been one hard situation after another. I've been left feeling drained and disappointed.

But I'm learning more about God this way.

It hit me this afternoon, as I was agonizing over yet another stressful situation, that this was my chance to become more Christ-like. I won't grow in my faith by experiencing nothing but feel-good spiritual highs. It's in facing the tough days that I realize that I can't do it on my own strength (something that I really need to be reminded of every day). I'm forced to rely either on my own, flawed strength to get me through or to cling to Christ. Each difficult moment is a chance to follow Christ in how I react to the situation. Do I show grace to others or do I sulk and feel sorry for myself? Do I serve others regardless of how I'm feeling? After all, it's easy to serve others when we're in a good mood or when everyone is getting along. But Christ doesn't excuse us from serving others just because we're having a bad day or because others aren't "playing nice".

Jesus stated "If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil." (Luke 6:32-35, ESV)

Expecting nothing in return.

Too often I serve others expecting some reward or praise. But Christ calls us to serve when there are no returns, when there's no point to the good things we're doing. It's not a matter of being blessed for our good deeds, but of being obedient to our call as Christ's followers.

what we know

"That our idea of God correspond as nearly as possible to the true being of God is of immense importance to us. Compared with our actual thought about Him, our creedal statements are of little consequence. Our real idea of God may lie buried under the rubbish of conventional religious notions and may require an intelligent and vigorous search before it is finally unearthed and exposed for what is is. Only after an ordeal of painful self-probing are we likely to discover what we actually believe about God."

A.W. Tozer, The Knowledge of the Holy

How many of us are content with what we have learned about God from Sunday school? What would Christianity look like to the world if we were more passionate about knowing our God? Why do so many of us settle for what we already know about God instead of daring to go deeper?

ready and waiting

The past month has found little time for me to update my blog (mostly because of my own laziness). I had accidentally deleted by blog roll, and am just now finding all the blogs I used to link. Other than a quick quote yesterday, this blog has mostly gone untouched. I've had little inspiration, but maybe I should wait to be "inspired" before I write/update. I want to update with deep, thoughtful posts, but sometimes the deepest thought in my head is how fast can I get into my PJs once I get home.

A whirl of spiritual and emotional ups and downs have left me feeling dizzy and drained. In the end, I feel like I'm still in the same spot as always...

1. Still searching for church home and the energy/drive to make regular attendance.

2. Still wading through Grudem's "Evangelical Feminism and Biblical Truth"....I think I've been reading it by bits and pieces for the past few months. While insightful and thought-provoking, and definitely a topic I feel like I need to study more, I feel that in the case of spiritual growth, the book has had very little to offer....but perhaps more on that later when I finally finish the thing!

3. I've been extremely naughty and avoided my women's Bible study for a month now. I love the people, and I love the teacher, but we're going through a "women of the Bible" study, and honestly, I would be happier with a good book study than the same old "how-can-I-be-a-better-woman" sort of thing.

But on the brighter side...

1. I'm doing Scripture memorization. No, really. As I lamented to my husband the other day, I've tried before and usually end up quitting after three weeks and can never again remember what I memorized (which he kindly pointed out meant I hadn't memorized it). But my aim is a little bigger this time. Not a verse here or there. I want to learn a large chunk of Scripture this time, and so far, I've been pretty good about for the past four to five weeks. I think it's the fact that I'm memorizing a large whole rather than just piece-meal verse that has kept me going...

2. I'm going to spend the next few months exclusively studying Romans. I'm trying to depart from my oh-so-generic devotions of reading through a book but getting no "meat" out of it. I'm ready to take it up a notch.

So that's sort of my personal "state of the union" for the moment.

waiting for autumn

This may sound odd, but I'm completely psyched about the approach of autumn. Fall is my favorite time of year. I love the explosion of colors as the leaves start to turn. The brisk air, the thick sweaters, the chunky yarn that is extra-popular during the fall months. Curling up with a blanket and thick socks, reading a good classic (right now I'm reading Stoker's Dracula because for some reason in my mind, I associate it with autumn). I even rushed to complete one of my crochet projects today so it would be ready for the cooler air (it's a super chunky wrap).

So I'm ignoring the fact that it's still reaching 90 degrees almost every day. I'm itching for the cooler weather. It's just something about that time of year that makes me feel closer to God. Maybe it's because I love the season so much that I feel closer to nature/creation, and therefore, God. Or I love big, bulky sweaters, and being more comfortable with myself helps me to be more comfortable in general.

Regardless of the reason, I'm looking forward to this next "season" in my life.

simple ministry

Ministry. The word sounds so “official”, evoking images of all of the customary ministries the average church-goer encounters: the pastor's duties, the children's ministry, youth group, etc. Or we think of men or women with websites or blogs that reach hundreds or thousands of readers each day, teaching and encouraging others in Christ.

But ministry isn't just for someone with a seminary degree. How do we expect the body of Christ to work when we expect the minority to do the work of the majority?

All of us are called to minister according to our spiritual gifts (see 1 Cor. 12). It doesn't have to be on a grand scale or impact hundreds at a time.

Some ideas for simple ministry:

* baking something tasty for a friend or family member that's sick or feeling a little down

* sending a quick "thinking of you" card to older relatives that you don't see often (I read a suggestion somewhere of carrying cards with you in your purse so that if you're stuck waiting in an office, you can whip them out and write a quick note)

* providing breakfast (muffins, bagels, orange juice) to your co-workers on a Monday morning

Christ calls us to do what we can, where we are. Ministry is a day by day, moment by moment thing. So what can God do through you today?

I had forgotten how addicting blogging could be. I'm spent most of last night and a good bit of this morning tweaking my blog's appearance and trying to add relevant and interesting information. I've been almost overwhelmed by boredom lately, and this has given me something new and exciting to tinker with. Now all I have to worry about is content. Do I really have anything special/unique/original to say? I hope so. More and more I feel God calling me from my every day existence into something else. To be honest, I've felt miserable having my degree in Christian studies and then working in an entirely different, un-ministry related field. I've berated myself over and over again about what a waste it is, to have studied so hard and to never use it. So maybe this is my chance to use what I learned in four years getting my Christain studies degree. Maybe its time for me to stop limiting what God can do in my life and through me.

popularity trap

I've caved and returned to the world of blogging, but this time I have a purpose in mind other than publishing a continual pointless whine-fest (I fancy that I've matured over the last year since I had a blog). This time I want to have a little more depth to my blogging. To delve into spiritual matters, to reflect on myself and my relationship with Christ. This is a search for completeness, something I think can't exist without Christ. And I want this to be an honest reflection of my struggles through life and faith. I'm not setting out to preach. I'm trying to share a more honest view of Christianity. With movies like Jesus Camp and the like out there, I wondered what people really know about Christians other than generalizations that categorize us as whacked out, holier-than-thou hypocrites. And what do people really know about Christ? Many people will say they like the teachings of Christ, but only seem to like the ones about not judging others and they don't seem to know much else about what He taught (I guess I'm the one making the generalizations now). So I want to take off that perfect Christian mask that I hide behind and show people what behind all the religious stuff, I'm just an imperfect human loving a perfect God. And as I do this in the safety of the anonymity, I want to do this in real life as well.

May God bless this.